God's Economy

Tomorrow, T.J. and I embark on another New Phase of our life. One in which we're simultaneously pursuing advanced degrees.

We know it's God because it's really hard and we never would have planned it this way. That's His signature move with us.

It's like that old joke, "You can't live on one income and have a full-time MFA student and a half-time grad student and a 4 year old and a full time job." And God says, "Hold my beer..."

But really, on paper, we can't. We can't. It's not there. Nothing is there. This is seriously fuzzy math. And if God had said, "OK, here's the plan..." I would have said, "Hard pass, God. Hard pass."

But He didn't.

He said, "Savannah, start this master's program. It's OK that you don't know the outcome of TJ's job yet. Have faith."

And so I did.

And then He said, "Hey guys, that job is going away. Just hang on. Have faith."

And so we did.

And the summer was filled with those God moments: Unemployment that was way more than expected. Editing jobs for TJ that just came out of the woodwork. Book sales. The random friend who wants to pay you too much money to video a wedding. A scholarship I received that was only $250 turned out be a "typo" and was really $500.

Evidence of God's Economy.

And then, less than two weeks before classes would start, we got word: TJ had been accepted into the Master of Fine Arts program he wanted. Orientation was a week away. There was paperwork to do, classes to register for, too many books to buy.

And we prayed a Big Prayer. I prayed, "God, you've gotta do this. Bring your unexpected, overwhelming financial help here."

And you know what?

He did.

And when it happened, we both starred at it and said, "This isn't right..." "Something must be wrong ..." And we're a little bit still waiting for someone to say, "Oh, oops! Sorry about that..."

I don't know why we're surprised. In our 8 years of marriage, God has always worked like this for us. It's not a prosperity gospel, by any means, it's more of a "just enough" gospel.

God knows what you need. He promises us that in Matthew 6 (among other places): “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life — whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?
“And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

And Matthew 7: “You parents  — if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him."

It's a lot of scripture that everyone knows. And I know it. And yet, how often do we believe that we'll actually be taken care of, that our needs will be met. Our NEEDS. Not our wants. Not our needs as we define them. Our needs as God sees them and will meet to His Glory.

That's where it sometimes falls down. Why is God meeting TJ and my needs, but not others? I can't answer that. I have no lines about how your faith isn't as strong enough, or your calling isn't strong enough. I can't explain why God does what He does when He does. He's never taken my opinion in to account.

But, what I can tell you is this: God hears you. He does meet needs. It might no look like you expect, it may not be on the timeline you think you need. But He's there. And He'll show up.

God's economy is nowhere near ours. His math doesn't match ours. He knows what He's doing. Right now, He's asking TJ and I to do something hard and scary.

Whatever hard scary thing He's asking you to do, I ask you to do one thing: Have faith. Do it.

One thing TJ pointed out to me was this: Our Big Prayers weren't answered until we'd stepped out in faith and said, "OK." We'd signed up for the classes. We'd enrolled. We'd stepped out. And standing out there on nothing, there was a road beneath us.

Have faith. Step out. God will be there. He will not fail you.

He's never failed us.